Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Everyone, Bow your Heads and Pretend to be Serious

Image from August J Pollack
This, quite possibly, is one of the funniest damn things I've read in a while. Apparently as part of an effort to promote Aqua Teen Hunger Force on the Cartoon Network, people have put up little glowing signs of Ignignokt the Mooninite giving the middle finger. One is found in Boston, and in spite of its size shape and cartoonish appearance, was taken to be a bomb. The city of Boston shut down the subway when it was discovered, and upon discoverind a series of the very same devices, basically shut down traffic for a large part of the city so that they could, essentially, blow up a bunch of lite-brites. Maybe a jackass ad campaign, but major law and political officials are trying to play this up still to keep from having to admit that they kind of look stupid putting everyone through this crap.

An angry Mayor Thomas Menino said a stiff penalty will be pursued against whoever was responsible for the devices.
"It's about keeping a city on edge. It's about public safety," he said.

So a stupid show (one I actually like quite a bit, but lets face it, the last thing ATHF is is smart) has a stupid ad campaign that causes stupid people to act stupidly in dealing with what they really didnt need to at all. Pretty stupid so far right? it gets better.

John Aravosis takes the opportunity to attack Turner Broadcasting as a whole by connecting it with his problems with Glenn Beck, a host (and yet, funny enough, also a parasite) on CNN against whom there are legitimate complaints, as detailed here. Beck basically seems like an ignorant semi-bigot who landed on TV and needs to be scraped off, but Aravosis seems to be trying to conflate one asshole on CNN with a marketing campaign for a show on the Cartoon network to launch a micro-jihad against Ted Turner evidently.

Oh, you wanted more of teh stooped?

Mayor Menino has had the two people responsible for the "hoax" (which suggests they were only pretending to put up the lite brite mooninite signs I guess, its just getting stupid now), insulting the show as "failing" (the movie is coming out soon) and threatening to sue Turner in order to cover himself for the fact that anti-terror resources were diverted because of governmental incompetance, not the malicious will of the two men responsible for the signs.

Peter Berdovsky and Sean Stevens have not actually broken any law (unless theres some sort of flyering rule they could theoretically be charged with) and clearly had no intent to cause city-wide panic and disturbence. The devices on even the most rudimentary examination are clearly not threatening. Honestly, if I left a flashlight sitting on the sidewalk (which would, basically, contain the exact same electrical components as these signs did) and called in a bomb threat on it, and the police then went and hunted down every similar looking flashlight, detonated them, wasting dozens of hours and thousands of dollars following up on something that any kind of sense would tell you isnt a threat, they shouldnt have the right to prosecute MagLite for their own stupidity. Jesus damn Christ.

Good on the two of them though for having sense enough not to take the prosecution of their not-crime seriously. They just held a press conference and refused to answer questions not relation to hairstyles from the 1970s.


  1. Someone else commented somewhere else that if they find some kid's Speak & Spell on the sidewalk, they'd send in a hostage negotiator.

  2. The “Patriot Act”
    LIFE is NOT easy as a Federal Whistle Blower, but when you have the PATRIOT ACT behind you, it does make it Satisfying from a Law Man’s point of view. Your co-workers get investigated, your Church, even the little ole lady that bumps into you at the grocery. Why? Standard Procedure. I'm NOT Joking. One of the bad parts is your getting audited by the IRS almost every year. Keep it Squeeky Clean is my Motto !
    Here's the BEST part, anyone on this Website is 'Under Investigation' now. Why May you ask ? Because all my actions are closely monitored and investigated. They think some more “bad guys” will come after me for PAY BACK. They are absolutely correct.
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    Now, any “Atheist” organization is automatically labeled as a “possible” terrorist cell. It is handled just like it was the Taliban or AlQuida. Sorry, ideology has done you in.
    I drop the DIME on LOW LIFEs like you! I give them a TIP on possible suspects, they follow it up. Now every Atheist site I can find. I go to it, and leave this message as a warning. Giving you HALF a chance to survive. Watch your step. It is REAL. You will see suspicious characters watching you, and agencies working you in the background.
    I testified against the Japanese Mafia in Atsugi, Japan. Drugs, Classified Documents sold, Prostitution, & Black Marketing to name a few in the year 1998. Onboard US military installations. Talk about a BIG bust ! I went under cover, and transferred out to LIVE.
    I've been working as a undercover DHS agent for Years. Now, I am coming out of UC status and I will be heading to my new assignment. Thanks GUYS and GRLs! This last BUST put me Over the TOP as the #1 Agent in the USA. They want me to come Up there and Teach new agents how to handle themselves in the field “not getting Cocky.” Playing by the rules. Its Quite Rewarding…. Spiritually. The LAWMAN and I work closely together. Brotherhood & Sisterhood MIXED together. I am a former police officer as well. That’s what drove me to “clean up” the military bases and make our Military Uniforms stand for something …. Again.

    Go Ahead PUNKS! Laugh it Up! The IRS will be auditing each one of you, DHS will do a complete background check, and the FBI will be visiting your work places to interview your coworkers! THIS is so SWEET. You know who you have to Blame >?
    NONE other than a LOUD MOUTH “Atheist” webmaster - DALE ! thanks Dale.
    This is his website:

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